Mannequib hand broken from the wrist and seperated from the forearm Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

How can you not feel broken and shattered after a breakup?

You might feel like you've experienced damage beyond repair and parts of you will be missing forever.

But there’s an ancient practice called kintsugi that could help you put the pieces of yourself back together again.

Broken pieces of a plate being put back together with gold glue


Kintsugi is an ancient Japanese art stemming from Zen Buddhism of repairing broken pottery with gold lacquer.

tea being poured into a teacup that has been mended with gold lacquer Image by ededchechine on Freepik

The philosophy behind this practice is that breakage and repair are a part of your history. By embracing your scars, you can create something stronger and more beautiful.

How can kintsugi be helpful?

Whether a heart or a bowl, kintsugi can help reframe the way you see things that are broken as things that are ready to be made new.

Lessons from Kintsugi Quotes

In her book, Kintsugi Wellness: The Japanese Art of Nourishing Mind, Body and Spirit, author Candice Kumai outlines some kintsugi principles that you can use to find healing after a sad and stressful experience.

hand holding a kintsugi bowl Photo by Motoki Tonn on Unsplash

You can use these impactful lessons from kintsugi quotes as the gold to help you begin the worthwhile journey of mending your broken heart.

1. Wabi-sabi

Wabi-sabi is about accepting that life is imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete. In accepting this, you can be more aware of how things are beautiful just as they are.

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The antifragile perfects being imperfect.

— Roger Spitz, author & futurist

2. Gaman

Gaman is about persevering through the difficulties of life with patience and dignity. In times of distress, one should not be reactive, instead, show self-control. This shows an inner strength.

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If you’re broken, hold until each piece of you heals one again.

— Samara Rhea Samuel, strategic thinker

3. Eiyoshoku

Eiyoshoku is about nourishing your body. This can be done through eating well. When you take care of your body, it has a positive effect on your mind too!

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A change of the exterior circumstances of our life only works through the transformation of our body.

— Emmet Fox, spiritual leader

4. Yuimaru

Yuimaru is about focusing on nurturing your current relationships. It roughly translates to "the spirit of cooperation." You can begin to heal by loving others and letting yourself be loved by those who love you.

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Deepening our relationships can help us be kind to ourselves. When we know that we have a good support system, we tend to take care of ourselves a little more.

— Cynthia V. Catchings, licensed therapist

5. Kansha

Kansha is about expressing gratitude but much deeper than that, it is being grateful and appreciative of the good and bad in life. Gratitude lets you appreciate everything as it is, instead of how you think it should be.

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Gratitude is about the good and the not-so-good. Everything happens for a reason, and there is no difficult situation that comes our way without a purpose.

— Cynthia V. Catchings, licensed therapist


The stress and sadness Sam experienced after a break-up has caused them to indulge in junk food and to isolate themselves as a way of finding comfort. Which kintsugi principles would you let them know about? Select all that apply:

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You’re more than equipped to handle life’s endings, and you can continue to cherish all the things about your life that are imperfect and worth valuing as they are!

A person rubbing their hands and saying,


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