What is the "dignity model" for conflict resolution?

We've all been there: a heated argument with a friend, family member, or coworker.

Things are spiraling out of control — tempers flare, harsh words are yelled, feelings get hurt, and there's no hope of resolution.

Photo by Shubham Panwar on Unsplash

But, by learning to handle disagreements with dignity, we can transform this scenario using a practice called the "dignity model".

Conflict is an inevitable part of life. How we handle it can make all the difference.

What is Conflict?

Conflict is a disagreement or clash between individuals or groups with differing viewpoints, interests, or desires.

Common Causes of Conflict:

• Miscommunication

• Differing values or beliefs

• Competition for resources

• Power struggles

• Emotional triggers

What is Dignity?

According to Donna Hicks, dignity is the inherent worth of every person, regardless of their background, beliefs, or actions. She explains the concept in the video below:

The importance of dignity in conflict resolution:

When dignity is compromised, conflicts can quickly escalate, leading to:

• Hostility

• Retaliation

• Broken relationships

However, when people feel valued, they're more likely to:

• Engage in open and honest communication

• Listen actively

• Reach mutually beneficial solutions

By understanding the role of dignity in conflict, we can approach disagreements with empathy, compassion, and a commitment to finding peaceful resolutions.

The following principles and tips can help you handle conflicts with dignity and grace.

Core Principles of The Dignity Model of Conflict Resolution

1. Equality and tolerance for all individuals: Treat everyone with kindness, empathy, and understanding, regardless of their differences.

2. Active listening: Pay full attention to the speaker, without interrupting, and seek to understand their perspective.

3. Empathy: Put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to see the situation from their point of view.

4. Non-violent communication: Express your needs and feelings honestly and assertively, while avoiding blame and accusation.

Practical Tips for Applying the Dignity Model

• Approach the conflict with a positive mindset: Focus on finding a solution, rather than 'winning'.

• Use "I" statements: Express your feelings and needs without blaming the other person. For example, instead of saying, "You always do this," say, "I feel hurt when..."

• Practice listening: Pay full attention to the other person and ask clarifying questions.

• Validate the other person's feelings: Acknowledge their emotions, even if you don't agree with their perspective.

• Seek compromise: Be willing to meet the other person halfway.

The Workplace Disagreement

Photo by Andreea Avramescu on Unsplash

Imagine a situation where two coworkers, Alex and Riley, have a disagreement about a project deadline. Alex believes the deadline is too tight, while Riley argues that it's achievable.

How can Alex and Riley apply the dignity model in this situation?

1. Respect

Alex and Riley address each other by name and avoid making personal attacks or insults. They stick to the issue at hand.

Riley: Alex, I wonder if we could talk about this deadline.

Alex: Sure, Riley. Just give me a moment, and I'll be right with you.

2. Active Listening

Alex and Riley take turns speaking and avoid interrupting each other.

Alex: Riley, I understand your concern about meeting the deadline. Let's break down the tasks and see if we can distribute the workload more evenly.

Riley: Thanks for listening, Alex. I think you're right. Perhaps we could prioritize the key tasks and delegate some of the less important ones.

3. Empathy

Alex and Riley try to understand each other's perspective.

Alex: I know you're feeling stressed about this project, Riley. I feel the same way."

Riley: I appreciate your understanding, Alex. I'm trying to balance this project with other commitments.

4. Non-violent Communication:

Alex and Riley express their needs and feelings honestly, but avoid blaming or accusing each other.

Alex: I need more time to complete my part of the project. Could we consider pushing the deadline back by a day or two?

Riley: I understand your concern, Alex. Let's discuss this with our team lead and see if we can find a solution that works for everyone.

By applying these principles of the dignity model, Alex and Riley can work together to find a mutually beneficial solution that minimizes stress and maximizes productivity.

To take your learning of the dignity model even further, consider taking the following steps: