You've broken up with your partner but you still want to be friends.

Now you've got to figure out how to do that without things getting messy.

Ross from Friends uncomfortably saying

Put Some Distance Between You And Your Ex

Even if you still want to be friends, it may be a good idea to spend some time apart.

This will help you both get some closure and figure out what you really want.

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Ask Yourself Why You Still Want To Be Friends

Take the time to think through why you want to remain friends with your ex.

Good Reasons to Stay Friends

  • The break up was mutual and you both would rather be friends

  • You are both over the relationship and enjoy hanging out

  • You both feel you were better friends than lovers

guy saying

Bad Reasons to Stay Friends

  • You still have romantic feelings for them and don't want to lose them

  • You think that staying friends could lead to getting back together

  • They insist that you stay friends even if the idea makes you uncomfortable

Lady saying

Reach Out To Your Ex

After enough time has passed and you still want to remain friends, reach out to your ex.

Talk to them about how you feel and get an idea of where they are at.

Lionel Richie saying hello into telephone

Quiz

You talk to your ex and get the vibe that they still have romantic feelings for you. Should the two of you stay friends?

No

Yes

Communicate Boundaries

It can be easy to slip into old relationship patterns when hanging out with an ex.

Man leaning over and saying

Make sure you are both on the same page about where you draw the line between a platonic friendship versus a romantic relationship.

Enjoy The Friendship

best friends drinking in sombreros

Few people know us as well as the people we've dated.

Enjoy spending time together and being a part of each other's lives.

If either you or your ex finds a new partner, accept it as part of the deal and discuss any boundaries you might need to re-establish.

Take Action

Do you think you and your ex could make a platonic friendship work?

woman thinking with equations on the screen

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This Byte has been authored by

PB

Paul Borkowski

Helping to make learning easy, accessible, and fun