What's the difference between polyamory & open relationships? Are they right for you?

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Have you heard of polyamory but don't exactly know what it means? Or maybe you or your partner are curious about opening your relationship but aren't exactly sure what that would entail.

Knowing about the differences between these two relationship styles can help you decide if they're right for you.

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Polyamory is defined as having intimate relationships with more than one person. Sometimes this could look like more than two people loving each other together, or even one person loving multiple people who aren't interested in each other, but are fine having a relationship with the same person.

Open relationships are based on an established couple in which one or both partners agree to see people outside the relationship. This could be done separately or together. The established relationship usually takes priority over the outside relationships.

Polyamory

• All relationships are equal

• Relationships are sually emotionally involved

• Can be a relationship of multiple people together

Example of a polyamorous relationship dynamic: Emma and Alex are dating and they are both interested in pursuing a relationship with James. The three of them agree to be together. Emma mentions wanting to date other people outside of her relationship with Alex and James. They agree that it's fine.

Open Relationships

• The established relationship takes priority

• Outside relationships tend to be casual

• Can look for outside partners together or separately

Example of an open relationship dynamic: Amy and John are married but are interested in opening their relationship. They both want to seek intimacy with other people but agree to prioritize their marriage over outside partners.

Communication and consent are very important in both of these relationship styles. You and your partners must agree on how each of you will navigate connecting with new people.

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Think about what type of relationships you may have or want. This could be with a current partner or potential partners.

Do you feel comfortable exploring relationships outside of the committed partnership you have? Would you also be fine if your partner did the same? An open relationship could be a good fit for you.

If you're curious about polyamory, think about whether having multiple intimate relationships with consenting parties is right for you. Do you feel like you could navigate a potential relationship where more than two people are all together?

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It may be difficult to determine if these relationship styles are right for you. Consider some pros and cons to see if you agree with them.

Pros

• Everyone involved has the opportunity to get what they want from the relationships

• Improved communication between partners

• Learning to stay true to yourself and know what you want

Cons

• Not feeling the same way your partner does

• Feeling like everyone's needs aren't being met

• Communication between all partners can feel difficult at times

Each of these pros and cons centers around communication and consent. Whether you're pursuing polyamory or opening your relationship, practicing communication is key to setting healthy boundaries that you and your partners will be comfortable with. Even if it's difficult, everyone has to be honest with each other to see if the relationships will work or not.

Check out this resource for navigating ethical non-monogamy relationships.

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Whether you discover you enjoy polyamory, open relationships, or neither, it's important to make sure you have proper communication with any of your partners.