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Are you tired of feeling left out at social events that friends, coworkers, and couples usually attend together?
Do you avoid going to events alone because you don't want to feel uncomfortable or awkward?
If so, you might benefit from learning how to prepare for and enjoy social events on your own.
1. Research the Event and Attendees
Researching the event and the attendees involves examining the event details and any available information about the people who will be attending.
This can help you:
Understand the event's purpose and theme
Identify potential conversation topics
Prepare yourself mentally for the event
For example, if you're attending a book club event, you can read the book in advance and prepare your thoughts on it. You can also look up the author and other works they've written to be better prepared for the discussion.
2. Plan Your Outfit and Appearance
Planning your outfit and appearance can help boost your confidence and make you feel comfortable and stylish at the event.
This can involve:
Choosing an outfit that is appropriate for the event
Practicing good grooming habits such as showering, brushing your teeth, and styling your hair
For example, at a book club event, you might wear:
Business casual attire, such as a blouse or button-up shirt with slacks or khakis
A dress or skirt with a nice blouse or sweater
A casual outfit with comfortable yet presentable clothing like a pair of dark jeans, a blouse or shirt, and a blazer
3. Practice Small Talk and Conversation Starters
Small talk and conversation starters are great tools to break the ice and start conversations at social events.
Practicing opening lines and greetings. Greetings can be as simple as introducing yourself and asking how the person is doing.
Preparing questions about the event or the attendees. At a book club event, you might ask, "Have you ever been to a book club before?" or, "What did you think of the book?"
Sharing personal stories or anecdotes. You might share a funny story about something that happened to you recently or talk about a hobby or interest that you're passionate about.
Did you know?
Research shows that practicing self-affirmations can help to boost your confidence to engage in conversation at an event.
4. Set a Goal for the Event
Setting a goal for yourself can help you stay focused and motivated throughout the event.
Networking goal,such as meeting new people or exchanging contact information
Learning goal, such as gaining knowledge about a specific topic or skill (e.g., at a book club event, your goal might be to learn how to analyze literature more effectively)
Personal goal, such as trying new activities
Quiz Time!
You're attending a book club event alone. You researched the book and the author, planned your outfit, and practiced small talk and conversation starters. Now you want to set a personal goal for the event.
What is a possible personal goal can you set for the book club event?
A. Reading the book during the event
B. Winning a debate with other attendees about the book
C. Meeting at least 5 new people
D. Correcting the grammar mistakes in the book
Quiz
Select the correct response:
Setting a personal goal for the event can help you stay focused and motivated. Meeting new people can help expand your social circle and increase your confidence. While reading the book during the event or correcting grammar mistakes might be relevant to the book club event, they're not personal goals that will help you overcome your social anxiety. In addition, while discussing and debating different opinions and interpretations of the book is encouraged, setting a goal to "win" a debate with other attendees could come across as confrontational and might discourage others from sharing their perspectives.
Take Action
Don't let fear hold you back from experiencing new things and meeting new people.
Enjoy the benefits of attending social events on your own!
This Byte has been authored by
Lani Matsumura
Instructional Designer / eLearning Developer