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Did you just move to an unfamiliar place? Feeling irritable, sad, or anxious about your new home?

Small pug dog with a sad look on its face wrapped in a blanket on top of a bed.Photo by Matthew Henry on Unsplash

Your feelings are normal.

With some time and effort, these feelings will pass.

As a military spouse, there have been times when I’ve found myself resentful and uncomfortable in a new place. 

Over time, I’ve been able to recognize that while culture shock is real, it doesn’t have to be a permanent state of existence. 

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Are you experiencing culture shock?

Stewy from Family Guy lying on the floor surrounded by broken furniture, gif says, ' I hate it here'

Culture shock is a term that describes the experience and feelings associated with living in unfamiliar surroundings and conditions.

It's typically associated with living in a foreign country, but being immersed in a new culture can happen in your home country too.

Regardless of where you experience culture shock, there are a few things you can do to manage your feelings and thrive in a new place.

Tip #1: Remember, it's a process

Gif of Ally Love riding a Peloton coaching riders to trust the exercise process

Culture shock happens in phases. Knowing that these feelings of sadness, anger, and frustration with a new culture or environment are only one part of the process can help.

The 4 stages of culture shock:

1. Honeymoon

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  • curious

  • excited

  • positive

2. Hostility & Rejection

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  • frustrated

  • anxious

  • sad

3. Adjustment

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  • objective

  • relaxed

  • finding balance

4. Acceptance & Adaptation

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  • acceptance

  • sense of belonging

  • sensitivity toward the host culture

arrow icon with 4 distinct parts of a process.

Negative feelings about a host culture can be overwhelming at times. Awareness that the next stages of culture shock are adjustment, acceptance, and a more objective stance in general have helped me move through these feelings with more confidence.

Balance and perspective are key to managing the feelings that come with culture shock.

Quiz

Which of the following mindsets can help you manage culture shock?

Did you know?

Culture shock is a kind of stress. Whatever healthy stress management strategies you've used in the past can help with culture shock, too. Physical activity is a great strategy to incorporate into your schedule.

Tip #2: Remember what you love

Steve Carrell on Zoom GIF. He's saying, 'its so great just to see your face.'

Maintaining connections to where you come from is vital.

Stay in contact with the people you love and continue to do the things you love to do.

Use technology to help maintain connections regardless of distance.

  • Skype, Facetime, Zoom, WhatsApp

  • Social media

  • Virtual book clubs (or virtual anything)

  • Apple Watch or other fitness trackers

Finding ways to incorporate your old life into your new environment will ground you.

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Quiz

Alex just moved to a new city for a job. She's surprised by how much she misses her colleagues. What could she do to stay connected?

Did you know?

Feelings of sadness, loneliness, and resentment can increase in frequency or intensity if you isolate yourself, so it's important to get out there!

Tip #3: Find something new to love

A whole new world Aladdin GIF

Connect with your new home in meaningful ways.

restaurant table with wine bottle and glasses

Find local hotspots for food, drink, physical activity, museums, religion, or whatever is important to you. Explore the natural world around you by finding local parks, beaches, hiking trails or mountains.

Three individuals, smiling.

If you've moved for a job, ask your new coworkers for suggestions on places to visit and things to do.

Smartphone with a hand making a selection on the screen.

A quick internet search can yield some worthwhile results for you to explore. Try something like:

  • Best local restaurants in...

  • Top 20 things to do in...

  • Where to get a drink in...

Quiz

Alex moved from Colorado to South Carolina. She misses how easy it was to hike a challenging trail or mountain. How might she maintain her love of the outdoors in her new coastal city? Select all that apply.

Did you know?

If you've moved to a place that speaks a different language, learning that language is a vital step in your journey. Your confidence and comfort level will increase as you are able to communicate with your new neighbors.

Take Action

photo of a neon pink sign that says, 'and breathe' on a background of greenery..Photo by Max van den Oetelaar on Unsplash

I've come to love things about all the places I've lived, but not without some conscious effort. Being intentional about managing the unpleasant feelings associated with culture shock will allow you to be present and enjoy your new home.

Here are some ways to get started:

License:

This Byte has been authored by

CL

Cassandra Lock

Educator and Instructional Designer

M. Ed.

English

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