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Giving feedback can be awkward. Who likes telling someone where they need to improve?
If you're a leader (or want to become one!), feedback is an essential part of your role
96% of employees say they want to hear feedback regularly
Employees who receive regular feedback from their managers are 3x more engaged at work
So how can you become more effective at giving feedback?
Like most things in life, the answer can be found in the sphere of Rupaul's Drag Race. Specifically, with judge Michelle Visage.
It's Clear Why We Should Listen To Her
How Michelle does it
Drag Race contestants know that Michelle grew up in the NYC club and ball scene around drag culture
She is also known for her work singing in a girl group, Seduction
This context for her skills and background makes it clear to queens why her feedback has value for them
How you can do it
What skills or experience do you have that are relevant to the feedback you're giving? Share your backstory (without making it all about you!)
When I was learning to public speak, I practiced by...
I also worked in retail for a few years. What I found really helpful was...
Over the last 3 years at this company, what I've found effective is...
She's Coming From A Good Place
How Michelle does it
Michelle's feedback is always rooted in the fact that she wants to help the queens improve their drag
She never gives feedback with a hidden motive, or to benefit herself
This builds trust between Michelle and the queens, and can make it easier for them to swallow direct (and sometimes harsh) feedback
How you can do it
Be up front! It might feel a bit awkward to say, but if you're genuine, share the reason why you're offering this feedback.
I'm hoping this will be helpful feedback for you so next time you can speak with even more confidence.
I know that if we can work out these kinks, you'll be able to not just meet, but exceed your targets.
I think with some more work on this, you'll be ready to take on a leadership role in our team.
Did you know?
Rumie is a nonprofit community dedicated to making innovative learning free for everyone.
She's Super Specific
How Michelle does it
Michelle doesn't dance around what she means, which can sometimes come off as harsh
She'll explicitly tell queens that they need to work on blending their makeup, improving their padding, or that their outfit is too basic
This makes it crystal clear what the queens need to work on to take it to the next level
How you can do it
Be explicit! What is the specific element or skill someone needs to work on? If you are too general, it's hard for someone to understand what to work on.
When you repeat "um" and "uh" a lot, it makes you sound unsure.
When talking to customers, make sure to tell them about our sale after offering to help.
You need to keep focused during the meeting. When you go on tangents, it takes the group off topic.
She Acknowledges Progress
How Michelle does it
When a queen improves from one week to the next, Michelle is the first to give them credit
She tells them she can see they are putting the work in
Acknowledging the effort makes the queens feel seen, and because she's a tough critic, they know they've really earned the recognition
How you can do it
Be generous with your praise when it's earned - tell people you can see the work they're putting in
Great job presenting to the team. You've definitely reduced the number of 'uh's' and 'ums' which made you sound a lot more confident.
Awesome work with that customer! After you mentioned the sale, I saw them fill up their cart!
Really nice job staying focused in the last meeting. Following the agenda closely was a great way to keep things on topic and moving forward.
People Want Her Feedback
How Michelle does it
Michelle's role is literally a judge, so all the contestants are signing on to get her feedback
In real life (aka not reality competition shows), it's important to make sure someone will be open to your feedback (otherwise, you're wasting your breath)
How you can do it
Before launching into your feedback, prime them so they can get into the right frame of mind
I took some notes during your last presentation. Is it okay if I share some feedback with you?
I pulled some of your sales stats from the last month. Do you have some time to go through it together?
Do you have time this week to debrief the project meeting? I have some thoughts on what I went well and opportunities to improve.
Quiz
Which of these would be a good way to prime someone for feedback?
Telling someone ahead of time that you'd like to debrief is a great way to give them some buffer time to prepare, and makes it less likely that they'll be emotional or caught off guard.
Take Action
When in doubt ask yourself: What Would Michelle Visage say? 😜
Take the next step to put this into action by:
This Byte has been authored by
Sam Zimmer
Rumie Director of Learning